Reclaiming Calm in a World of Worry

Navigating fear and uncertainty with self-compassion, gratitude, and timeless wisdom

A moment of respite from life's uncertainties.

One of my common forms of self-torture involves vacillating between two things I need to work on. I’ll decide to focus on one, only to think of all the reasons why I should be working on the other instead. Then I switch, and a little voice in my head says: “But you really need to be doing the other work. Go back to what you were doing before.”

I'm poking fun at myself, but when I'm caught in this mental tug-of-war, it's no fun at all. It can be agonizing.

We torture ourselves in many ways, moving far beyond the daily mental battles that pull at our focus. Many of us are deeply concerned about the future of our democratic institutions—and how could we not be? Each day’s troubling post-election headlines fuel our worries about the President-elect’s controversial agency and cabinet picks. Many of these nominees are inexperienced, have dubious credentials, and are potentially reckless. While we hope these nominees will rise to the enormous responsibilities they may face if confirmed, their past statements and actions give us pause.

In this time of political and social uncertainty, we also grapple with our daily struggles—paying bills in these times of rising costs, maintaining our relationships, and all the what-ifs that keep us awake at night. These worries weigh on us, often giving rise to fears that can spiral out of control, compounding the sense of uncertainty and making it harder to find peace in the present.

Ancient Wisdom in Modern Times

When our fears grow loud, we have to silence them. A former colleague once reminded me that we all need to be our own “first line of support.” One way to do this is to focus on your breathing, letting it steady you and block out those dark forecasts. Breathe. Then repeat this lovely reflection from Julian (also known as Julianna) of Norwich, a revered mystic of medieval England: “All will be well. All will be well. In all manner of things, all will be well.”

Of course, some might view these words from medieval times as overly simple, given the complex challenges we face today. But for those who find comfort in them, such timeless reassurances can provide a moment of peace even in our uncertain world.

I saw this play out recently with a friend facing both health issues and work uncertainties. Over coffee, she told me her story, choking back tears. Her doctors couldn’t give her clear answers, which made every twinge of pain more frightening. When I asked what scared her most, she spoke of her fear that everything would keep getting worse, with no way forward. But as we talked, she began to see something different: while her situation was undeniably difficult, she had navigated hard times before. This simple realization helped her focus on finding solutions one day at a time.

Her story reminds us how natural it is to worry. Whether we’re facing personal crises like my friend’s work and health challenges, or feeling deep concern about our country's future, these worries can cloud our perspective and make it hard to see a way forward. In these moments, our minds can become our own worst enemies, cycling through endless what-if scenarios and second-guessing our every move.

From Worry to Action 

When worst-case scenarios assail you, it's crucial to maintain a compassionate inner dialogue. You might remind yourself, “I can focus on what's within my control.” This simple acknowledgment can help reshape your thoughts when uncertainty feels overwhelming.

Another powerful way to quiet these scenarios is through gratitude. Thank God (or the universe) for your circumstances—no matter how you feel about them. Consider keeping a simple list of things you’re grateful for—it doesn’t have to be extensive. Studies have shown that practicing gratitude regularly can lower stress levels and even improve sleep. In one study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, participants who kept gratitude journals reported increased optimism and reduced stress levels.

But what does practicing gratitude really mean? Brené Brown, research professor of social work at the University of Houston, reminds us that it doesn't require grand gestures. “I don't have to chase extraordinary moments to find happiness,” she says. “It's right in front of me if I'm paying attention and practicing gratitude.”

This practice often means appreciating the small, everyday blessings we might otherwise overlook. Don't look for “biggies”; most of life's blessings are beautifully ordinary. For me, I'm grateful for food on the table despite rising prices. I'm grateful for the laugh I got from one of my favorite shows. As an ovarian cancer survivor, I'm grateful for every day of life. And I'm grateful for the unwavering support of my loved ones through difficult times.

What about you? Gratitude helps us shift our focus, reminding us of the good in our lives even when worries threaten to overwhelm. It's a small but powerful step toward reclaiming calm in uncertain times.

Each breath, each moment of gratitude, each act of self-compassion brings us closer to living fully in the present. Remember, you're not alone in your concerns—whether they're personal or about our shared future. Keep moving forward, one step at a time. All will be well. We live and love to our fullest potential only after we make liars of our fears.

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